Oct. 30, 2006
"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. "Philippians 4:6-7 NIV


This verse has become my verse to live by. This has always been one of my favorite verses. I've tried to live by it and not worry, but I must admit that now I am having to work a little harder. I do get anxious about all of this with Hawk. But when I do, I say this verse to myself and I start praying for Hawk and all of our family.

This picture is of Kayla(with black hair, she put a temporary color on it, but immediately washed it out), Hawk and Skyla taken on Saturday Oct. 28, 2006 in our backyard on the tire swing that Mike put in the tree for the grandchildren.

They all love it.






Hawk in the treehouse being a typical little boy and acting silly. He feels so good and has so much energy.




















He was getting very tickled at throwing the ball at Mike.

Hawk has a lot of things in his favor to beat this illness. His name is lifted up daily in prayer by a lot of people, he laughs all the time, he gets lots of sunshine and exercise(he has so much energy that he is on the go all the time), he is surrounded by a lot of love and we stay very positive and have a lot of fun with him when he is at our house.


Sweet little Skyla fixing to get on the slide. We have 7 little baby chickens, and Mike took Skyla and Hawk to the barn to see them. When they got back, I asked Skyla what she thought about them and she said" They're black"., and she's right, they are black.

She talks all the time. She talks very well and has a big vocabulary. She tries to do everything that Hawk does. The other day, Hawk was counting to 10 and she was counting right along with him. She's learns a lot from her big brother.










Kayla with her hair black. She washed it out soon after this.

All of the smaller grandchildren love her. She is very good with them and a lot of help. She loves taking care of them.














Oct. 30, 2006.

Little Brooke. I kept her today while her mommy cleaned house. She is a little cutie, also. She talks all of the time also.

She loves to wear high-heel shoes. She can walk very good in them. She found a pair of my high-heel (very low heels) today and she put them on and wore them around the house.

She likes to have her finger nails and toenails painted. Her big sister, Breanna, is taking dance lessons and Brooke likes to dance like her "sissy". She is so cute when she does this.










Another picture of Brooke.


















Another picture of Brooke.











This is a journal and updates about Hawk and his family. It is easier for me to type this than to write it.

We are trying so hard to help Hawk fight off the tumor. He is on an organic food plan and natural supplements and drinks. We have been a little lax with it in the past, but we are stepping it up and trying to be as close to 100% as we can(I am talking for Lindy, Mark, Jamie and Mike and I). Our goal is to try to help him to get his little body in the best condition it can be and maybe have a chance at fighting this. Mike, Jamie, and I are always positive with him and are always having fun with him and all of the grandchildren. But they are all so loving and enthusiastic, that it's not hard to be that way.

I feel like that he's done so well (and still feels good and has a lot of energy) with the regimen that he's been on, that if we get 100% with it, then it has got to give him a better chance of beating this.

We pray for a miracle, and pray that God's will be done. I pray for strength for Hawk and all of us.

A few weeks ago, they had Grandparents Day at Breanna's school and at Hawk's school. Breanna's was on Monday. I went up there to see her. Tuesday and Brooke went with me. They were having a book fair. When we got there, Breanna was paged and she came running down the hall to greet us. We went to the book fair with her and I let her and Brooke pick out some books. Then we had some refreshments and went to see her room. Her teacher has her room fixed up very nice.

On Friday of that week, I went to Hawk's school for breakfast. I was a little late. But not the last one. Anyway, I had to go into his room to get my and his plate(the food was set up on long tables in the hall between the classrooms). I saw him before he saw me. He was looking a little sad--I guess he thought no one was coming to eat with him. When he saw me, his face lit up with the biggest smile. Nothing could ever be worth more than that. After we ate, I sat down in a chair close to Hawk and he came and got in my lap and layed his head over on me. He sat there for a long time and just wanted me love on him. I just held him and talked to him and loved on him.
I cried all the way home. He was telling Mike about it the other day. about when his Nanna came and ate breakfast with him. He is so precious. All of the grandchildren are so precious. There is nothing in the world like having a grandchild. They bring so much joy and happiness in our lives. Mike and I are so BLESSED to have our grandchildren. We love all of them so much and thoroughly enjoy every minute we have with them.

Breanna goes to a small school in a small town. The classes start in kindergarten and go through 8th grade. Anyway, every year at this time, the teachers take the children to the nursing home to give candy to the residents there. The other day was the first time for Breanna to go and she got to ride the school bus for the first time. She really liked that. I think this is so great for these little children to go to the nursing home to visit. Breanna said that she was used to doing that because she used to visit Nanny Ethel (my mother) in the nursing home. Also, Kevin and Tuesday took Breanna and Brooke to the nursing home last year and let them give candy to the residents.

Update on Shaylee McDonald. I talked to her grandmother about 2 weeks ago and she said that Shaylee was very weak.

I will call her in a minute and update this later.

Oct. 27, 2006 Hawk went back on Thursday for the results of his last MRI. It is not good news. The tumor has started growing. He looks so good and feels so good that it is hard to believe that he has something so terribly wrong with him. There were a lot of tears shed on Thursday, but none in front of Hawk. I called all of our family and told everyone and everyone was just heartbroken all over again.

This picture was taken at the park.

Dr. Kuttesch told Lindy that this was the beginning of the end. There is nothing else that the doctors can do.

He told her and Mark(Hawk's step-father) to start thinking about what they and Jamie will want to do if Hawk starts getting worse. The options are chemotherapy, which he does not recommend because it has not been proven to help in any way---clinical trials(which is a form of chemotherapy), which is experimental drugs--or Hospice. Jamie and Lindy have been saying all along that they will not do anything to prolong Hawk's suffering. They do not want to give him any steroids. The side effects of steroids are flu like symptoms and debilatating arthritis. Their joints hurt so bad that they have to be on pain killers. It is so hard to write about this, but I know that a lot people are concerned for Hawk and a lot of people have been and continue to pray for him, and I know that everyone wants to know how he is doing. Anyway, Jamie, Lindy, Mark, Mike and I are all in agreement about what to do for Hawk. We all love him so much. We do not want to see him suffer any more than he has to. We do not want to see him suffer at all. There is no medical cure for this tumor. If any of this would cure him, it would be another thing, but none of it will cure him. It will only prolong his suffering. At this time, Jamie and Lindy have decided that Hospice and drugs to ease his pain will be the only thing that they will do. They want Hawk to have the best life he can. Hopefully, these decisions will not have to be made for a long time(although Hawk's doctor believes that it will be soon).

But we are not through fighting for Hawk's life. He is on herbal supplements and on a organic food plan. The doctors have been amazed at how well he has done so far. Dr Kuttecsh told them that he was amazed at how well hawk has done. (he was amazed until this last MRI, when the tumor started growing again.) He absolutely did not expect Hawk to be doing this well at 10 months after diagnosis. We have heard of some more natural supplements that could help him and all of us will be starting those with him. As for Mike and I, he will eat nothing but organic foods when he is with us. We have heard of others who have beat the odds (Lance Armstrong and Naomi Judd are two). The medical doctors have given up, but we have not given up. And we pray constantly. We know that God can heal him. I have absolutely no doubt that God can heal him.

I know that Lindy is overwhelmed with everything. She teaches during the day and grades papers at night, so I have offered to take some of the burden from her. I will call her weekly to make sure that she has everything on hand that Hawk needs, also I will do all of the ordering for her. All she will need to do is tell me what she needs and I will order it and have it sent to her. Mark works full time and Jamie works full time nights and sleeps during the day. I am retired, so I have more time to help with this.

When Jesus was in the garden of Gethsemane, He prayed that "this cup be removed from him, but that God's will be done." I pray that this cup be removed from Hawk, but that God's will be done. We are told to give thanks in ALL SITUATIONS. I am thankful for Hawk. I am thankful that he is my grandson. He is such a loving little boy.

He tells all of us all the time how much he loves us. The other day, I told Hawk that I loved him all the way to the end of the universe and back and he said that he loved me "36". this is a lot because this is a big number to him. When we got to our house, I told Mike that Hawk loved me "36 and Mike said that the other day he told him that he loved him "15", I guess that Hawk thought that Mike's might be a better number, so he said, "Nanna, I love you "15 also." I need to write all of this, because I might forget it someday.

I am thankful for our family's faith. There is absolutely no way we could get through this without our faith and walking closely with Jesus and clinging to him. I am thankful for all of the people who are praying daily for Hawk. We take it one day at a time. Right now Hawk is full of energy, and is happy and feels great and looks great. I don't believe that any of our minds can go past just today.



This is Breanna and Hawk taken at the park at Skyla's 2 birthday party










This was taken in Breanna and Hawk's Sunday School class on Breanna's 6th birthday. Hawk is on the far left, Breanna is in the middle with the pretty white dress on.

















Hawk and Breanna at Sunday School on Breanna's 6th birthday.














Skyla at the park at Breanna's birthday party.


















Hawk playing ball with Uncle Kevin











Skyla at the top of the slide.















Brooke and Skyla at the park.













Pa Pa Mike with the two little girls, Skyla and Brooke. They are 2 years old.






I do have a lot of faith and I know that God will do the right thing for Hawk whatever it might be. But sometimes when I look at these pictures of him and our precious little grandchildren, I just cannot accept the fact that he might not make it and might not be here. When all of this first happened, Mike and I decided that we would just take it one day at a time or we would go crazy with grief, but sometimes it all just overwhelms me. I just cannot imagine all of our lives without him--and that is why I am so thankful for God's words of encouragement. What would we do without the Bible and our faith and God's love and the love and prayers of others like all of you.

Sept. 9, 2006. Mike and I and Jamie took the children to see Thomas the Train in Nashville. They all had a great time. They got to see Sir Topham Hatt. We left there and stopped at McDonalds with them. Jamie had somewhere to go, so Mike and I had all four of the children with us. Anyway, this Mcdonalds did not have a play place in it, so Hawk was getting a little upset about that and Breanna told him that it was okay that we could just eat and chitchat.

Skyla, Breanna, Hawk and Brooke in front of Thomas.

Hawk and Breanna riding the train (acting silly)

Hawk(being silly) typical cute little boy and Breanna

Jamie and Skyla

Pa Pa Mike and Brooke

Hawk and Breanna

This is of Breanna taken at the lake. We have great news about her eyes. Her Doctor took the patch off of her left eye. The right eye is as strong as the left eye now. PRAISE THE LORD. She started kindergarten with the patch on. Kevin and Tuesday had prepared her for the fact that some of the children might tease her about the patch and some of them did make fun of her, but she had a great attitude about it. She said that she didn't care if they teased her or not that she just wanted her eye to get better. And now it is. The doctor said that she can get contacts at 7 years old. That is only 1 year and 1 month from now.

Breanna on her way to dance class.

Sept 4, 2006---We had Hawk's 5th birthday party on Sept 4. His birthday was August 31, but we celebrated on Sept 4. Everyone had a great time. Those who attended were: Hawk's great-grandmother, Cathy Waddle and her husband, Derald Waddle and their Maltese puppy, Snowball. Mike's sister and brother-in-law, Regina and Mike Carr., Our good friends, Frances and Charlie Parson, Larry and Angie Finley and their children, Autumn, Kira, and Seth., Our son and daughter-in-law, Chris and Wanda Smith and Wanda's daughter and son-in-law, Angel and Bobby Soucey and their children, McKenzie, Jenna and Brian., Pam and Gene Blair and their granddaughter, Akira., Our son and daughter-in-law, Kevin and Tuesday Smith and their children, Breanna and Brooke., Our son Jamie and his children Hawk and Skyla., And Mike and I and Kayla.

Hawk got lots of nice presents and lots of nice cards and money. He got a nice card and money from his great-uncle and great-aunt, Sammy and Debbie Smith from Loretto, Tn., He got a nice card from his great-aunt and great-uncle, Wanda and Warren Parker from Myrtle Beach, S.C., Warren bought a book of stamps and one of the stamps was of a comic book character from the 1930's. It was Hawkman. Anyway, Wanda put that stamp on Hawk's envelope because it was Hawkman.

We had lots of good food. We didn't have a birthday cake, because Hawk cannot have sugar. But I baked some organic chocolate chip cookies and everyone liked those. The children played outside with the battery operated car and 4-wheelers. They also played sack racing and the limbo. His uncle Chris and aunt Wanda got him a huge flying saucer and he and the children really enjoyed playing with that. Also, his great-aunt and uncle, Regina and Mike Carr got him a huge 3-D kite of an eagle and we were able to get it up in the air later that afternoon.

Hawk was pretty worn-out by the evening.


This is Jenna, Hawk, Autumn, a friend of theirs, Breanna, and Akira.

Hawk.

Hawk. Puppy Snowball is laying on the floor.

Jenna, Hawk, Breanna, and Akira, Seth in background playing video game.

Hawk, Breanna and Seth

Little Brooke with Spiderman

Frances holding Skyla

Chris, Wanda, Skyla, Hawk, McKenzie, and Akira

Hawk running, Breanna, McKenzie, Autumn and Kira

Everyone playing the limbo--Kira, friend of hers, McKenzie, Autumn, Kayla, Akira, Tuesday holding Brooke and Breanna going under

Little 5-month old Brian riding the 4-wheeler. Chris on the treehouse steps, Pam in swing, Bobby, Angel holding Brian, Jenna with doll, Wanda taking picture and Frances watching and Jamie watching
We are so thankful for how good Hawk is doing. I have absolute unwavering faith that God can heal him. We have already seen many miracles--Hawk was very sick by the time we got him to the Doctor for the first time. He went through 6 weeks of radiation and steroids with no side affects. Some children are left with some very disabling side-affects. It has been 9 months since he was first diagnosed. A lot of people with this disease do not get that long. When he was first diagnosed, we weren't sure if he would get to start kindergarten or not. Lindy said that she would have signed him up for T-ball, but she wasn't sure if he would be able to play or not. PRAISE GOD!!! That Hawk is doing so well. He feels good, he looks good, he has lots of energy and lots enthusiasm for everything and he is a typical little boy full of mischievous. And we are so HAPPY that he is doing all of this.

Thank all of you so much for all of you prayers. May God bless all of you.

Happy Birthday to Hawk!! Today is Hawk's 5th birthday.

We will have him a birthday party on Monday, Sept. 4th. His Mom is having him a party on Saturday.

We called him this evening to sing Happy Birthday to him and he wouldn't talk to us. This is very unusually for him. Lindy said that he wasn't feeling good and that he wouldn't let anyone tell him Happy Birthday today. His Uncle and Aunt from North Carolina called and he wouldn't talk to them. Lindy said that he wouldn't talk to anyone who called today and he wouldn't let anyone tell him Happy Birthday.

Naturally, this has us concerned. Anything unusually that he does always has us concerned. Lindy said that he was not feeling good because he has an upset stomach. Hopefully, he will feel better tomorrow.

As part of his birthday present, we are planning to take him and his little sister, Skyla,(23months) his cousins, Breanna (5), and Brooke (2), to ride Thomas The Train next Saturday, the 9th. Mike, Jamie and I are taking them. It is a treat to all of them from Mike and I. I'm sure that they will have a lot of fun doing that.

GREAT NEWS!!!

The results from Hawk's MRI yesterday were good. The tumor stayed the same. As long it is not growing, this is good news. His doctor said that he looked good. Hawk feels really good right now.
Every time he goes back and the tumor is not growing, we are so thankful.
Thank you for all of your prayers.
He will go back in 2 months for his next MRI.

Weekend of August 18 thru 20, 2006. Hawk had a rough night on Thursday night with coughing all night, so Lindy decided to keep him out of school on Friday. Anyway, he decided that he wanted to come over and spend the night with us on Friday night.

Lindy brought him and Skyla over and they spent the night on Friday.

I had taken down the babybed and put the toddler bed up for Skyla and for Brooke. Hawk wanted to lie down with Skyla and get their pictures taken.

















Here he is kissing her goodnight. They are so sweet together. They love each other very much.













On Sunday Kevin and Tuesday took Breanna and Brooke to the Wilson County Fair. They came by our house after the fair. Breanna won first prize in the duck racing contest, the duck she picked out won the race.

Here they are riding Fancy.













On Friday night, Hawk decided that he wanted to build a campfire. Even though it was about 90 degrees outside, Mike built him a campfire.

He came running into the house and said Nanna, we need some marshmallows to roast. The only marshmallows we had were the miniature marshmallows, but we managed to put them on a wire and roast them. We only roasted a few. Hawk and Skyla didn't eat any, but it was fun to roast them.















Mike, Hawk, and Skyla roasting marshmallows.

















Hawk standing by the fire.













Another picture of Hawk by the fire.

We will get the results of his last MRI on Thursday. I will post the results when we get them.

Please pray that everything will be okay.

More pictures taken last Saturday, August 12.
Hawk standing beside the fountain.
















Hawk getting his ball out of the hole.













Kevin, Tuesday, Breanna, and Brooke. They came by after church on Sunday. I had lunch fixed for them.

Kevin, Tuesday, and Breanna changed clothes and went back to church to do some work and Brooke stayed with us.

Mike took Brooke with him to take off the trash and they went by to visit him mom, Cathy Waddle and her husband Derald. They enjoyed seeing Brooke. Brooke was asleep when they got back.

Later in the afternoon, our good friends, Fran and Charlie Parson called to see if we wanted to go get something to eat. I told them that I had a lot of food cooked, so they came by and ate at our house and visited for awhile.

These were taken at our house and at the putt-putt golf course last Saturday (Aug. 12, 2006).



Hawk hitting a golf ball in our front yard. Being a typical little boy and sticking out his tongue for the camera.


Jamie couldn't get over how well Hawk can hit a golf ball. He is very athletic. I am not a Nanna bragging on her grandson, but a lot of people have commented on how well Hawk can throw a ball and bat a ball and hit a golf ball. He is just very talented with anything to do with sports.



Mike, Jamie and Skyla playing putt-putt. We have a new Sports Center in Lebanon. It is very nice. Hawk had been there before and really wanted us to go. So we went Saturday night.










Hawk fishing his ball out of the water. It just happened to go into the water several times, so that he could get it out again.









Mike helping Skyla with her putting. When we first got there we only got clubs and balls for Mike, Jamie and Hawk. I didn't get one because I was taking pictures. Anyway, Skyla ended up with Mike's club and ball.












Hawk and Skyla waiting for the rest of us.
















Hawk playing air hockey with Mike and Skyla. Skyla wanted to play even though she wasn't big enough to reach the table.








Mike helping Skyla play air hockey.

Hawk goes back on Thursday ( Aug. 17, 2006) for his next MRI. Please pray that it will shrink some more or go away. We will get the results on Aug. 24. I will post the results.


On the way to play putt-putt, Hawk was riding with Mike and I and Skyla was riding with Jamie. We got in front of Jamie and Skyla, this always tickles Hawk, if the car he is in beats the other one.






Skyla riding Fancy. We had so much fun with them on Saturday and Saturday night. After we left the Sports Center, Jamie took them home with him