JAMES HAWK SMITH

THE LAST TWO WEEKS OF HAWK'S JOURNEY ON EARTH:

January 18, 2007

Hawk was on Channel 4 today with Make-A-Wish-Foundation. All of this month, channel 4 is featuring some of the children who have been helped by Make-A-Wish-Foundation. We thought he did a great job and was so cute!!! But I guess we are a little prejudiced.The other day when Hawk and Skyla were here spending the night, Hawk and I were in the kitchen playing a game on the computer and Mike and Skyla were in the living room watching cartoons. Anyway, all of a sudden, Skyla came into the kitchen and said to Hawk, "I love you, Bubba." and Hawk said "I love you too." They are so cute. They tell each other and all of us that they love us all the time. Skyla calls Hawk "Bubba". That is Jamie's nickname also.

SEE POST LABELED JANUARY 21, 2007

WEDNESDAY JANUARY 24, 2007:

Lindy called and said that Hawk was walking different as if he had an inner ear infection. I thought how can that be. He was walking great on Sunday when he was here.

FRIDAY JANUARY 26, 2007:

We decided to take Hawk on a ride on the Music City Star commuter train. It was Mike and I, Kayla, Mike's mom: Cathy Waddle and her husband Derald and Hawk. We got on the train in Lebanon. Jamie got on in Hermitage. Hawk was excited to see him. We noticed that Hawk was walking different. We had been noticing changes like his eye turning in, but had been hopeful that he would stay well. But after seeing him on Friday, we knew that he was taking a turn for the worse. We had no idea how fast it would be. He loved the train ride. When we got into Nashville, Mike and Kayla walked downtown to get something to eat. Mike asked Hawk if he wanted to go and Mike would carry him, but he wanted to stay with his Daddy. On the ride down there and back, Kayla, Hawk and Jamie sat in the upper row of seats. Jamie and Hawk got off at the Hermitage stop. Jamie and Hawk drove on into Lebanon and picked up Skyla and Hawk and Skyla spent Friday night and Saturday with Jamie. Jamie and Leah took the children to the park on Saturday. They had a good time with their Daddy and Leah.


This picture was taken on Saturday January 27, 2007 at Leah's house. Leah takes such great pictures of them.





SUNDAY JANUARY 28, 2007:

Mike went to church on Sunday. Kayla and I stayed at home. I was thinking that we would go and get Hawk and Skyla after church. Anyway, Mike drove up after church and he had Hawk and Skyla with him. I am surprised that Hawk went to church that day, he was already limping very bad because of his left leg. Anyway, after Sunday class, Hawk hobbled into Mike's class and ran into Mike's arms. He insisted on coming home with Mike, even though his Dad was supposed to pick him up later and bring him over. I was so glad to see them. Kayla was still here. She played with the babies all day. We took her home later in the day. Hawk and Skyla wanted to spend the night. It was a huge difference in the way he was walking from Friday until Sunday. We felt so sorry for him. He could hardly walk. His left foot had turned in and when he would try to walk he would stumble and fall. I held him and told him that I was sorry that this was happening to him, and I told him that it was because of the boo-boo in his head. I wanted him to know that something was causing all of this. Hawk wanted to go downstairs and play in the playroom. Mike had to carry him down the steps. Hawk said, "Pa Pa, I'm walking different." This just broke Mike's heart. I had called everyone and told them that Hawk was getting worse by the day. Our son, Chris and his wife Wanda came over on Sunday night to see Hawk. Hawk crawled up in Chris's lap and said, "I love Uncle Chris, he knows everything. " Chris said that he would never forget this. I told Chris that this was Hawk's gift to him. They were shocked at the difference in Hawk from a week before. It was very sad to watch all these changes in him.

MONDAY JANUARY 29, 2007:

By Monday morning, Hawk realized that he wasn't going to be able to walk right again. He crawled up into Mike's lap and said, "Pa, I don't feel good. I don't walk right. I want to call my Mommy or Daddy." I tried to call Lindy, but she had went into school to put in her request for a leave of absence. Mike and I were crying, it was so hard to see all of this happening to him. I called Jamie and he said that he would be right there. He came and stayed most of the day with Hawk. By Monday morning, Hawk had started drooling really bad and was having a little difficulty with chewing and swallowing his food. He said, "Nannie, I can't open my mouth right. It's the boo-boo in my head." After Jamie left, Michael Drake (a close friend of Jamie) came by and brought the baked chicken from Wal-Mart. Hawk loves that chicken. He and Skyla ate a lot of the chicken. Michael stayed a long time with us and played with Hawk and Skyla. Hawk compensated for not being able to walk and played on the floor pretending to be a puppie with a broken leg or he would play with his cars and trucks and motorcycles. Hawk and Skyla went home on Monday night.

WEDNESDAY JANUARY 31, 2007:

Hawk came over to our house at around 10:30. Nannie Cathy and Derald called and wanted to come over and bring their maltese puppies (snowball and missy mae) over to play with Hawk. He had a ball with the dogs. He played on the floor with them for a long time. He still felt like playing, but he was just playing on the floor. Later in the day, I picked up Breanna and Brooke and brought them over. They stayed Wednesday and Thursday. Our good friends, Charlie and Frances Parson came over on Wednesday night to see Hawk. They brought coloring books for Hawk, Breanna and Brooke. For some reason Hawk got very frustrated trying to color, he was having double vision by now, so maybe that was the reason. Anyway, I picked him up and held him and he went to sleep on my shoulder. he slept for awhile and when Mike tried to get him to lay him down, he woke up and wanted to stay awake. Charlie and Frances had brought a motorcycle for Hawk to play with. They played with him for a long time with the motorcycle. He had a great time with that. We had made a tent in the living room for the children to play in. Hawk was getting tired, so he crawled into the tent and told us that he wanted to be alone. He fell asleep in the tent. We put Breanna and Brooke to bed, and Mike slept on one couch and I slept on the other one to be close to Hawk. Later in the night Mike got up and tried to put Hawk into bed, but Hawk woke up and wanted Mike to sleep on the floor with him and pretend that they were camping out (we had a fire in the fireplace insert).

SEE POST DATED THURSDAY, FEBRUARY, 1, 2007

An update to the post on Thursday February 1, 2007: Hawk decided that he wanted some chicken mcnuggets, so Breanna and I went to McDonalds to get them and Hawk and Brooke stayed with Mike. Anyway, on the way back I called the house and Hawk wanted to talk to Breanna. She asked him if he wanted to talk to her imaginary friend and she started talking to him. I really couldn't hear everything she was saying, but Mike said that Hawk was getting so tickled at her. Hawk said, "Breanna, you're funny. I love you." Mike said that Hawk was laughing so hard. I guess that's the last time that he laughed like that.

SATURDAY FEBRUARY 3, 2007

Mike went to his mom's to help them with wallpapering the bathroom. I went over to see how Hawk was doing. I was shocked at the difference in him in just 2 days. He had started having severe headaches on Friday night and difficulty swallowing. Hospice had started him on morphine and another medication for his anxiety. He had become very irritated that morning because he still wanted to play and his body wouldn' t let him. So he was given a medication to calm him and the morphine for the severe headaches. By the time I got over there he was barely whispering. Anyway, I held him and he said in a whisper, "I love you Nannie." This was the last thing he said to me. I told him that I loved him also. I called Mike and told him that he needed to come over. He came over and held Hawk and told him that he loved him "36". Hawk would tell us that he loved us "36". This was a lot because 36 was a big number for him. He whispered to Mike that he loved him "36". This was the last thing he said to Mike. At this point, we thought that he might be able to come over to the house the next day. Mike's Dad and step-mother, Jim and Jane Smith and Mike's brother and sister-in-law, Sammie and Debbie Smith were coming up from Lawrence County to see Hawk and our sons and families were coming over. My sister and brother-in-law, Wanda and Warren Parker were planning on flying in on the next weekend from Myrtle Beach, S.C. to see Hawk. I went home on Saturday night and made a huge pot of beef stew and 2 cakes for our company the next day.

SUNDAY FEBRUARY 4, 2007:

We got up and realized that Hawk would not be able to come to our house. Lindy had called Jamie and he had already gone over to be with Hawk. We waited for our family from Lawrence county to get here. I was having a hard time with this. I called Kevin and family and Chris and Wanda and told them to meet us over at the Mcpeaks, that's where Hawk was. After our family from Lawrence county got here we loaded all of the food that I had prepared and took it over there. When we walked into the bedroom where Hawk was, we knew that this would probably be his last day here. Hawk was lying on the bed with his eyes closed. He was having a really hard time breathing. Jamie was sitting by the bed holding Hawk's hand and crying. This was about 10:30 A.M. The Mcpeaks and Mark and Lindy were there. Our family was: Mike and I, Jamie, Chris, Wanda, PaPa Jim, Nanny Jane, Sammie, Debbie, Kevin, Tuesday, Breanna and Brooke and Skyla. Hawk never regained consciousness. He was on high doses of morphine via morphine pump. Later, Nannie Cathy and Derald and Mike's sister and brother-in-law, Regina and Mike Carr came over. Everyone loved on Hawk and told him how much they loved him and cried. I loved on him all day. I wanted to remember how his little forehead smelled and how it was to kiss his little head. Mike and I and Jamie and our relatives stayed in the room most of the time and loved on him and told him how much we loved him. We could not get enough of being with him. Anyway, later in the afternoon, everyone had left except Mike, Jamie, and I and Mike and Regina, Mcpeaks, Mark, Lindy and Skyla. Anyway late in the evening, Jamie decided to leave--he had to turn in some papers in order to get paid the next day. He intended to come back early the next morning. At this point, we had no idea that he wouldn't live through the night. Mark left, in order to sleep and go to work the next day. Mike and Regina Carr were still there. My sister had called several times to check on Hawk. Judy Roberts (Tuesday's mother in Florida) had called. Around 9:00 P.M, a lady from Hospice came in. Hawk was on morphine and the nurse from Hospice assured us that he was not aware of what was going with him. He was really struggling for breath. She told us that he would not live through the night. I called Jamie, but couldn't get him. He had not slept in three days and Lindy had given him a sleeping pill before he left in order to get some rest. Lindy put Skyla to bed. Mike and I decided that we would not leave. We would sit up in the room with Hawk. Mike got in the bed with Hawk and lay beside him. I sat on the foot of the bed. Ken sat in a chair beside the bed. Barbara and Lindy were exhaused and had layed down. Around 11:20, Mike noticed that Hawk's breathing had changed for the worse. Mike was holding him and talking to him and I was at the foot of the bed when he took his last breath. I had told him a few minutes before that it was alright for him to go to see Jesus. Mike and I had read that when people have a Near Death Experience, they hover over their body for a few minutes. Anyway, Mike said that maybe Hawk's little soul was watching , so Mike looked up at the ceiling and said, " Bye Hawk, we love you baby." I ran in the bedroom and told Lindy that Hawk was leaving. She ran in there, but he was gone by the time she got in there. I called Jamie and told him. Lindy held Hawk and told him bye. She was overwhelmed, so she went back and lay down. We had to wait for Hospice to come out and pronounce him. The lady came from Hospice and pronounced him and took all of the medicines and destroyed them and left. Then Ken called Partlow Funeral Home. Jackie and Jason Partlow came out. They were so nice. When they started to put Hawk on the stretcher, Jackie said that he wasn't going to cover him with the cold sheet (even though Hawk wouldn't know it), but he said that he was going to cover him with his warm blanket and that's what he did. Mike and I stayed with Ken until they took Hawk out of the house. We were told to meet the next day at 1:00 to make arrangements.

MONDAY, FEBRUARY, 5, 2007:

Jamie, Leah, Lindy, Mark, Mcpeaks, Mike and I met with Jason Partlow to make final arrangements. Larry Locke came by to be with all of us. Lindy and Jamie chose a beautiful wooden casket for Hawk. They chose the pall bearers to be Hawk's uncles: Kevin and Chris Smith, Lance McPeak and Jamie decided to help carry his son to his final resting place. I thought this was so sweet. He carried him through life and he carried him to his final resting place.


SEE POST DATED MONDAY FEBRUARY 5, 2007.

TUESDAY FEBRUARY 6, 2007

Mike's brother and sister-in-law (Sammie and Debbie Smith) from Lawrence County arrived at our house early in the morning. Our good friends, Charlie and Frances Parson, had brought a huge platter of ham and potatoe salad and rolls and baked beans for everyone. My sister and brother-in-law from Myrtle Beach, S.C (Wanda and Warren Parker) had flown in the night before. They arrived at the house. Then Chris and Wanda and Jamie and Leah and Mike's neice Melanie and Mike's dad and step-mother, Jim and Jane Smith all arrived. We all went to the church at 2:15 for the family viewing before the public arrived at 3:00. Mike's mom, Cathy and her husband Derald Waddle were there and Kevin and Tuesday and Breanna and Brooke were there.
There were a lot of pictures of Hawk displayed in the foyer. Jamie and Leah and Lindy and Mark went in first to be with Hawk before the rest of us went in. Jamie played "Your are my sunshine " to Hawk on Jamie's great-grandfather Kelly Price's harmonica. Jamie would play that to Hawk a lot while he was growing up. Hawk would play the harmonica also.




Here is a picture of Hawk when he was about 3 yrs old playing the harmonica.


Anyway, Jamie played the harmonica to Hawk and then placed it in the casket with Hawk.

Then all of the rest of the family went in to view Hawk. His little body looked wonderful. He looked so good. Partlow did a wonderful job fixing him up. It was a very emotional moment to see him lying there. He looked like he was asleep. At 3:00 the public started to come in. The church sanctuary holds around 1,000 people. There was a constant line of people from 3:00 til 7:00 P. M. Hundreds and hundreds of people came to see Hawk. One of the men from UPS came in his UPS truck. It was a tractor-trailor with doubles parked in the church parking lot. One of our friends from UPS said that no wonder we were so crazy about Hawk because he was so beautiful and he was. At 7:00 pm we sat down for the funeral. Larry Locke had a wonderful message about Hawk and our memories about him. He read our letter we had written about Hawk--see Post dated Tuesday, February 6.
The children from Hawk's school sang a special song that was written for Hawk. It was very nice.
The church was almost full of people paying their last respects for Hawk.
After the service, everyone left except family. We had one more chance to be with Hawk before they closed the casket.

WEDNESDAY FEBRUARY 7, 2007.

All of our family who attended the funeral and several friends and relatives attended the graveside service for Hawk. Uncle Chris, Uncle Kevin, Uncle Lance and Hawk's Dad, Jamie carried his casket to the grave. I think that was the hardest part--seeing his little casket sitting there ready to be buried. Larry Locke said some special things from memories we had shared with him about Hawk and read a scripture and said a prayer. Then they lowered Hawks casket into the ground. The men started shoveling dirt into the grave. Jamie went over and shoveled some of the dirt into his son's grave. Hawk's cousin Breanna ( she and Hawk loved each other so much) got as close as she could to his grave and watched everything. Breanna had brought 20 balloons to let rise into the sky. Each one said--We love you Hawk. As all of the children let the balloons go, Aunt Tuesday led them in a song of "Jesus loves me" and "This little light of mine". Tuesday gave a balloon to Lindy to give to Skyla. I had read a book to Hawk and Breanna titled "Someday Heaven". In the book, it described how when Jesus rose to Heaven it was like a balloon rising into the sky. When I read the book to Hawk, he wanted to see a balloon rise up into heaven, so I bought him a helium balloon and let him release it one day and watch it rise up, so I thought it was very special for Breanna to bring the balloons to rise up into Heaven in honor of Hawk.
After the graveside service, all of us returned to the church for a wonderful meal prepared for us. This is a wonderful ministry provided by our church. We were served a wonderful meal and dessert. Thank you so much to Vickie Working, Carolyn Lane and Chris Bradford for serving our family.

We prayed for a miracle for Hawk and we believe that we got a miracle for him. For a child that had brain cancer, Hawk was given a year of incredible energy, and a year of making wonderful memories with all of us. The last two weeks of his life, his little body was experiencing changes, but he kept a wonderful attitude through all of that. He actually had only two bad days. One on Saturday and on Sunday. And on Sunday, the last of his life here, I don't believe he was aware of what his little body was going through.

We love you Hawk. We can't wait to see you again and then it will be for eternity. We will never have to leave you again. Praise The Lord!!!

HAWK'S OBITUARY: I scanned the actual obituary, but it was too little to read. So I have copied it word for word.

James Hawk Smith
Graveside services for Master
Smith will be 11 a.m. on
Wedsneday, Feb. 7, in the
Bethany Cemetery with Dr.
Larry Locke officiating.
Visitation will be Tuesday, Feb.
6, from 3 p.m.-7 p.m. in the
College Hills Church of Christ. A
Celebration of Life for Master
Smith will be held after the visitation
in the College Hills Church of Christ at 7 p.m.
Master Smith 5,
of Lebanon died
Sunday, Feb. 4,
2007, at his home.
He was a kinder-
garten student at
the Watertown
Elementery School and he attended College Hills
Church of Christ.
Survivors include: father,
Jamie (Leah Holt) Smith of
Hermitage; mother, Lindy (Mark)
Taylor of Lebanon; sister, Skyla
Sno Smith of Lebanon; paternal
grandparents, Mike and Gwen
Smith of Lebanon; maternal
grandparents, Ken and Barbara
McPeak of Lebanon; paternal
great-grandparents, Jim(Jane)
Smith, of Loretto, and Cathy and
Derald Waddle, of Lebanon;
uncles, Lance (Julie) McPeak, of
North Carolina, Kevin(Tuesday)
Smith and Chris(Wanda) Smith,
both of Carthage; cousins,
Breanna and Brooke Smith of
Carthage and Kayla Conner, of
Thompson Station.
Active pallbearers will be
family.
In lieu of flowers the family
request contributions may be
made in memory of Hawk to the
College Hills Church of Christ
Children's Ministry. Alive Hospice
or "Make-A-Wish"